For the over the past ten years I have been an “Army Friend”.  Yes it is a play on words of the phrase “Army Wife”, but I do it in jest and definitely do not think I go through anything that even comes anywhere near what army wives go through.  You see my best friend, my #1 confidante, the person who knows me best in this world, the person I have the most fun with, the one I count on the most is an Army Wife, so I decided that makes me an Army Friend.

Because of her husband’s job we have not lived in the same state for over 10 years.  Although we still are very close and still can be there for each other, we miss out on the fun part- the hanging out together.  When he is gone on deployment I get to see her more; her visits home are longer. I get to talk to her more; her times in the evening where she would spend with him, she sometimes spends on the phone with me.  I enjoy this very much; it makes me happy to be able to have more Shelley time.  But I always realize that my extra happiness comes at a price- her family’s.  And that sucks.

This June, he will start a one year deployment in Korea.  I believe it has been more than two years since he has been deployed.  For that year Shelley and her kids will move back home.  I get her here with me for a year; my best friend, my #1 confidante, the person who knows me best in this world, the person I have the most fun with, the one I count on the most!  I am thrilled!!  It is the best news.  But it is sad news too.  My happiness once again comes with a price- her family’s happiness.

I get my friend close, but she gets to be a single mom.  I get to hang out with her, but she gets to worry about her husband and his safety as he is protecting our freedom.  My daughter gets to play with her kids, but her kids go a year without seeing their dad.   Yes, she gets me back for a year, but she loses him for that year.

She is an amazing mom; she is a strong woman; and her kids are too.  They have lived this life for a long time now, and they will be happy here at home.  They will have a great support system with family and friends nearby.  She will spend all the holidays this year at home; the first time in a long time.  Her kids will reconnect more with their cousins; her with her parents, sisters and friends. I know this will help make the year go by a bit easier for them.  I know I will be happy to have her, and I know she will be happy to have me.

I know I have no control over this situation.  I did not create it; I can’t help that it makes me happy- it would make anyone in my situation happy.  How can I feel bad about that?  I can’t.  BUT I can make sure she knows that I realize and feel for what she will be going through and although I can’t really understand all she will go through I can make sure she knows I am here.  I think she does..  I hope she does…